IS THAT YOU IN THE MIRROR?

Recently, suddenly, and radically, my face underwent a series of very sudden changes.

It’s not completely unexpected. I’m still at the age where my body’s squeezing out the last of the changes before I exit early adulthood, but I can usually pick out exactly what’s shifted. Last time it was my eyebrows, the time before that, I gained an inch of height, and before that, my hips got bigger…now though, I’m not really sure what changed.

At first, I thought it was because I’d started forgetting what I look like barefaced. I’ve taken to wearing makeup lately, which I’m having much fun with, and have even gotten around to regularly eradicating any traces of dark circles. Now I actually look sleep abundant, for a change, and my face overall looks brighter- but no, that’s not it, either. Even once I readjusted to what I look like, there’s still something there that wasn’t there before.

It made me quirk an eyebrow, because it must’ve been a sudden change that happened overnight; something that caught me while I wasn’t looking. Then I compounded on it recently by changing how I posture my tongue. I’ve always been one to hang my mouth open, even though I’m not a mouth breather, because I’ll be talking to myself under my breath so much I sometimes forget I have to close my mouth afterwards. Then I’ll get distracted by more writing, and keep my mouth spaced at the ready in case I have more I want to mumble. As a result, my jaw’s always sort of been propped open, and my tongue sort of rams into my overbite instead of sitting flush up against the roof of my mouth correctly. It gets worse when I sleep- my neck bends all the way backwards. Subsequently, my mouth is opened wide.

So I taped my mouth shut. A few days prior, I was joking that I needed to do that, so imagine my surprise when I stumbled across a box of the stuff for $5. I actually thought it was some stupid vanity thing when I picked it up, already being a little familiar with the trend going around, but imagine my surprise when I read the box and it said that it could help with deeper sleep and fixing your tongue posture. Well, shucks, I’m sold! We dropped it in the basket and went on our merry way. I used it for the first time that night.

About three weeks later, here we are. That thing wasn’t kidding! Man, I get the best sleep of my life with that stuff. I’ve already been a vivid dreamer, but this stuff’s got me sleeping a solid several hours. I don’t even wake up to pee. THAT’S a real knock-out, and apparently the kind you can get on the shelves!

Anyway, I was expecting to at least fix the alignment issues in my tongue and neck, but wowzers man, this stuff changed my whole face up. Two days later, and after briefly giving myself an adhesive burn thanks to accidentally getting my lips wet while wearing the tape, it actually changed how I look. The lower half of my face used to be a little on the long side, kind of like a mule, but now it’s…

What exactly? That’s really what bugs me the most- exactly what changed? You already know I’m capable and find great enjoying in spotting the difference, which is why this stumps me so. My face looks better as a whole, less recessed into my skull, but it’s hard to really tell what it changed. I’ve been staring in the mirror lately to figure it out, but no dice, so far. It made my lips fuller, I think, and my nasal bridge isn’t so flat anymore. What startled me more was that it didn’t happen gradually. The changed occurred overnight.

Eight hours of also having my tongue set in the correct place pretty much permanently fixed that problem, as well. Now it’s in the correct place even while I’m awake, which I’m sure only aides and retains the changes it’s made.

I’m certainly going to keep using it. Not just for aesthetic purposes, of course- I’m vain enough to admit that I’m a big fan of those changes, too, but I’m really excited that my mouth is no longer propped open when I fall asleep. Gone be the days I wake up with dehydrated incisors and a parched tongue. I’ll have record posture in no time.